Asking for Autistic Voices and Deleting
How it all Started:
On June 15, Connie Manning, an allistic (not autistic) mother of an autistic had made this post about
self diagnosis. I was made aware of this by a follower private messaging my Facebook page and telling me their concerns.
She goes on to say that
self diagnosis is not valid and gives reasons why. I am not
self diagnosed BUT who am I to judge who does not have access to a proper evaluation? I can tell you that most
self diagnosed autistics, if they had access to an evaluation, would seek it. She may have universal healthcare BUT its almost trying to use Medicaid to obtain a diagnosis. If I did not have a 30 page report from my ADHD evaluation, it would have been impossible.
She also states that the #actuallyautistic movement is dangerous. I have seen some good and bad with it, like any movement but we have caused some real change. Grouping a group of people and describing them a certain way is dangerous. That’s generalizing.
Yes there are some autistic people who hate parents but there are some of us who want to educate to make the world a better place for autistic children growing up. She states that the autistics that are dangerous are
self diagnosed.
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{Image discription:
I have hid the profile of the author of this post,to protect her from further bullying. This was a post by an intelligent, kind, autistic Mom, whose son is also autistic, non-verbal. The rest of this will be My opinion only: THIS is why the hashtag #ActuallyAutistic is dangerous to the autism community at large. It is my opinion that most who use it, and are self-diagnosed don't actually have autism, but use it as a platform for many other things, be it political, societal, intellectual or otherwise. Personally, when I see a group of people who use the hashtag #actuallyautistic and spew hate for everyone around them, from doctors to} |
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{Personally, when I see a group of people who use the hashtag #actuallyautistic and spew hate for everyone around them, from doctors to educators and especially to parents, I have a really hard time believing they truly are on the spectrum. Why? Because for one, my son is autistic. While I'm not, Ive had 23 years of living with someone who displays autistic traits, daily. Another reason is that I work in the autism community, and as such, have plenty of experience with all ranges of autism from nonverbal to highly academic, within our own organization and within our customer family. While Everyone is unique on the spectrum, I can confidently say that there is one quality that weaves its thread throughout everyone on the spectrum and that is 'purity!} |
{A recent example I will give, is when I offered a
comment that was of a different opinion that
the author, who claims to be #ActuallyAutistic.
Since then, I've had hate mail, threats to my
business, had a slogan made up and shared by
the community called 'Connie Is A CxxT....and
that is just a bit of it.
These people are bullies, and have their own
agenda, and use autism as an excuse to be
jerks.
To me, that isn't autism at all....
A perfect situation would be if everyone were
open minded. If everyone listened to another's
opinion, and valued their input. If real
discussions could be made without bias, so
that future autistics aren't having to go to battle
every time they have an opinion that is
different from #actuallyautistics}
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{There is something ethereal about autism. In my years of working with autistics at every end of the spectrum, I've yet to meet one who is spiteful, or uses hate mongering to further their cause. They also don't have a 'poor me' mentality.... They are fighters, like my son. They are caring, like my son. They are peaceful, respectful of all life and differences, like my son. There is a dangerous 'movement', I'll go ahead and call it, of #ActuallyAutistics who have decided on their own they have autism and that no one else should have any input but them. Most of them may very well have autism, but it's been my experience that many 'actually don't, and it's these ones that are giving autism a very bad name.} |
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{different from #actuallyautistics I believe #realautistics voices are being drowned out by self-diagnosed individuals with big chips on their shoulders who finally found something to use to be heard - at the expense of the autism community. Hey #ActuallyAutistics - Community doesn't mean just one group of people. It takes autistics, parents of autistics, siblings of autistics, extended family of autistics, teachers of autistics, doctors of autistics, therapists of autistics, employers of autistics to join together, learn about each other and pave a way for a better future for autistics. It shouldn't mean hate-mongering for anyone who isn't you.} |
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{A recent example I will give, is when I offered a comment that was of a different opinion that the author, who claims to be #ActuallyAutistic. Since then, I've had hate mail, threats to my business, had a slogan made up and shared by the community called 'Connie Is A CxxT....and that is just a bit of it. These people are bullies, and have their own agenda, and use autism as an excuse to be jerks. To me, that isn't autism at all.... A perfect situation would be if everyone were open minded. If everyone listened to another's} |
{I believe #realautistics voices are being
drowned out by self-diagnosed individuals with
big chips on their shoulders who finally found
something to use to be heard - at the expense
of the autism community.
Hey #ActuallyAutistics - Community doesn't
mean just one group of people.
It takes autistics, parents of autistics, siblings
of autistics, extended family of autistics,
teachers of autistics, doctors of autistics,
therapists of autistics, employers of autistics
to join together, learn about each other and
pave a way for a better future for autistics.
It shouldn't mean hate-mongering for anyone}
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{Connie Manning https://medium.com/@guy.t/you-and -i-are-not-the-same-autism-and-self -diagnosis-8bbc587f2e7d MEDIUM.COM You and I are not the same (Autism and self-diagnosi... 4h Like Reply Author Not your Neuro-Typical Family Connie Manning bye Connie Just now Like Reply} |
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{Connie Manning http://autismjabberwocky.blogspot .com/2012/10/whats-wrong-with -diagnosing yourself.html?m=1 AUTISMJABBERWOCKY BLOGSPOT.CO What's Wrong With Diagnosing Yourself with Aut... 3h Like Reply Ro Carlson Are you professionally or self diagnosed as NT? 2h Like Reply Connie Manning Ro Carlson professionally diagnosed as not NT. 2h Like Reply Ro Carlson Connie Manning do you feel confident in the diagnosis? If so, is it because the description of the diagnosis accurately describes your lived experience? 12m Like Reply Author Conversations With Chevy Ro Carlson yes I'm very confident in the diagnosis, and yes it does. Am Like Reply Ro Carlson Conversations With Chevy That's great! Ok so when we find the description that describes our lived experience - why is that so different?} |
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Connie Manning Once again, twist my words to fit your agenda. It's ok, I'm getting used to it. Just now Like Reply Message} |
After this situation, I did add the page to my
boycott list using the screen shots of what happened. The purpose of that list is to prevent autistics from being triggered by traumatic content. I state facts, that’s it. I am very objective.
She didn’t like that and made a post to her page. It’s fine, that’s her right. She was trying to rally people together to report my list on my own website. Good luck with that. We can’t even get MMS peddlers websites shut down.
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{Image description: link Facebook post on Conversations with chey: Conversations With Chevy Sep 2: Here it is.. use your own discretion, but in my opinion, most of these are great to follow. HONESTLY, everyone on this list should ban together and report this. i Jierceautie.com FIERCEAUTIE.COM Autistic Internet Boycott List Youtube I have included descriptions on what happened wi...} |
I had ignored her and just tell people about her who ask. A few days ago, there was a post by Conversations with Chevy. To someone who does not know her history it sounds genuine. She is clearly playing the victim. When Autistic people gave their opinions, she deleted the post and reposted. When you delete the post, the comments and reactions are deleted too.
{❤️ Took down original. Too much hate.
Not taking this one down, but no negative comments please. You bet your ass I’ll be tone-policing... now.
I won’t be bullied into taking it down altogether, but You don’t get to use MY platform for hate... start your own. 😆
Sincere apologies to those who shared original with the best of intentions - please share again. ❤️
And to those who shared it to fuel hate ...oh DARN. 😉}
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| {Dear #ActuallyAutistic When a parent of an autistic child comes to you with questions, trying to understand her little one's behaviour and needs, they are not looking for lessons on 'person first language' and how the puzzle piece is 'wrong'. They are looking for genuine help and guidance from the the utmost experts. Remember what autism advocacy is really about, because this is your opportunity to truly make a difference. They NEED you. To dismiss a parent abruptly, because they haven't followed your 'rules' doesn't help them, doesn't help their child, and certainly doesn't advance autism awareness in any way. It's ok to educate on the things that are important to you, but don't shun or berate a parent because they 'get it wrong'. Trust me, they want to get it right'. Conversations With Chery Let's work together, not against. We all want the same thing.}
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Connie's good friend Nazreem Bibi recently wrote a blog about how "autism moms are being marginalized" for
NCSA. (rebuttal coming soon) Together they are speaking out against
self diagnosed autistics. This is ableist, classist and racist.
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{12 Nazreen Bibi Retweeted Connie Manning @conniem... Oct 14 #Autism Awareness #autistic #autism you If you want to learn about autism, ask an autistic, If want to learn about autism, ask an autism parent, If you want to learn about autism, ask a professional, If you want to learn about ambian 5 22 9 10 SED Nazreen Bibi @NazreenBibi1 Oct 14 I am single and o my goodness I am so ready to mingle 7 1} |
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{Nazreen Bibi @NazreenBibilOct 14 Wow this lady is loud and clear!! Good on you @conniemanning44 Connie Manning @connie... Oct 14 Real autistics who have been through the rigorous process of diagnostics, communication therapies, appts, speech therapies,OTs etc should NEVER be told by an internet self diagnosed asshole what they can and can't say about their autism. Show this thread #actuautistic (crossed out) #diagnosedautistic} |
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{Thomas Clements 9 Retweeted Connie Manning @conniemanning44 · 15h From authentic_autism_advocacy (IG) #autism #Autism Awareness I agree, that the severe end of the spectrum is completely forgotten about by #ActuallyAutistic #ActuallyAutistic's incessant harping over trivial matters diminishes and undermines real lived experience of autism.} |
After much research, we found she is connected to a company called CalmWear. Calmwear Global is an Australian company that sells compression clothing to help with sensory issues. She has been promoting it on her Facebook page and there is nothing wrong with that. She does control the social media accounts for CalmWear. She was not forthcoming about her position with the company. She made it seem like she runs it.
Calmwear has two complaints through the Better Business Bureau. One is visible on the site.
In the complaint it shows that the consumer has dealt directly with Connie.
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| {Initial Business Response /* (1000, 5, 2019/07/02) */ Contact Name and Title: Connie M****** Director Contact Phone: ************ Contact Email: ******************* We have always been, and still} |
Connie was threatening an autistic advocate if they talk badly about the company at all, they would be sued. This violates freedom of speech. If its true, its not libel. This is especially interesting as there is no Business license outside of Australia.
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{+ Parenting Through The Fog Messages Hi there - you can attack me, but not a company. That involves a law suit. 6 hours ago Thanks for the message! Please be advised that the page manager app on my phone works intermittently at best. My chronic health issues make it difficult to keep up with messages and replies to everyone, as well. I do my best to respond when I can! Much love! 6 hours ago https://www.washingtonpo st.com/news/true- crime/wp/2017/08/01/ they-trashed-their-wedding- photographer-over-a-125- fee-so-a-jury-told-them-to- pay-her-1-million/? outputType=amp WASHINGTONPOST.COM They trashed their wedding photographer over a $125 fee, so a... 6 hours ago · Seen 10:10 AM You cannot reply to this conversation.} |
After much research, I found that they operate in 4 different counties. Canada, US, UK and Australia. They only have a business license in Australia. These directories are public if you know where to search for the information. Connie is only responsible for North America.
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{Contact Us USA 616 Corporate Way #2 Valley Cottage New York, New York 10989 Phone: 604 996 7484 Email: sales@calmwear.net Canada 3383 205 Street Langley BC V2Z 209 Phone: 604 996 7484 Email: sales@calmwear.net Australia 4/30 Metro Court Gateshead NSW 2290 Email: sales@calmwear.net UK 7a Corn Exchange The Market Place Swaffham PE37 7AB Phone: 020 3494 4060 Email: sales@calmwear.net}
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The Issue with No Business License:
There are policies and procedures in place to operate a business legally. When someone skips these procedures can lead tp severe consequences to the business.
If the business operates without a license , it can be forced to close. This means it cannot operate. In some cases, if a license is obtained after the fact, they are free to reopen. This is not always the case. IN some cases, a business may have to wait out a probationary period or a locale can refuse to grant a license.
Not having a business license is illegal. How severe the infraction is up to the locale. It also depends on the depth of licensing requirements. It depends on the type of business. There may be fines and fees associated with the infraction.
Not having a license leaves the entity open for lawsuits. If a customer decides they are not pleased with the product or service, they can sue in small claims court. If the business is not licensed, they can go after the owner individually and the plaintiff would be eligible for damages associated to a fraudulent activity.
IF a business is caught operating without a license, this can cause damage to a company's reputation. If business did not follow procedure to operate legally, they may not follow consumer directives either.
United States:
The address says they are in NYC. They are not registered for a business license in New York State
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{NYS Department of State Division of Corporations Informational Message The information contained in this database is current through Oct 15, 2020. No business entities were found for Calmwear. Please refine your search criteria. To continue please do the following: Tab to Ok and press the Enter key or Click Ok.} . |
Canada
CalmWear does not have a Canadian Business License. There. is no free public search for Ontario but Ontario is in Canada.
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{AA Ata.canadasbusinessregistries.ca C Français BETA: This is a new service – your feedback will help us improve it. CANADA'S BUSINESS REGISTRIES All locations Calmwear Q Active businesses Active and inactive businesses No results 0 results for "Calmwear”. Please try a different term. ABOUT THIS SERVICE} |
When expanding an already established foreign business in Canada, each province has their own registration procedures and fees for extra provincial incorporation. Since Connie is in Ontario, this will be used an example. If a non Canadian currently operating in another country, they need to register the company as an extra provincial corporation in that province.
To be an extra provincial incorporation, an Agent for Service, or an individual 18 years old older who is a resident in Ontario or a corporation having its registered office Ontario.
Connection with a Company that Plagiarizes Autistics
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{abr.business.gov.au Navigation ABN Lookup Type an ABN, ACN or name o ABN Lookup > Search > Current details for ABN 16 082 434 795 Current details for ABN 16 082 434 795 Current details Historical details Pdf Print Email}
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{abr.business.gov.au =Navigation ABN details ? help Entity name: INDASUN PTY LTD ABN status: Active from 01 Nov 1999 Entity type: Australian Private Company Registered from 01 Jul 2000 Goods & Services Tax (GST): NSW 2290 Main business location: Business name(s) ? help Business name From Queen Of Healing. 27 25 Mar 2019 CalmWear Global 21 Dec 2017 Hug For Change 05 Feb 2017 CalmCare 17 Jul 2011 Calming Clothing Australia 17 08 Dec 2014} |
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{abr.business.gov.au Navigation Jett Proof 12 Feb 2014 Trading name(s) ? help From 1 November 2023, ABN Lookup will not display trading names and will only display registered business names. For more information, click help. Trading name From INDASUN PTY LTD 25 May 2004 ASIC registration - ACN or ARBN 082 434 795 View record on the ASIC website a Deductible gift recipient status ? help Not entitled to receive tax deductible gifts ABN last updated: 25 Mar 2019 Record extracted: 17 Oct 2020}
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The founder of CalmWear is also the founder of JetProof. Both Companies are under the parent company of INDASUN PTD LMT. There is not any information on the parent company that can be found on Google. The parent company was registered in the year 2000.
She named JettProof after her son Jett:
"I founded JettProof to improve the daily lives of children and adults living with sensory needs by providing an all day wearable, effective solution. JettProof has the ability to positively transform the lives of children and adults living with Autism, Sensory Processing Disorder, ADHD, Anxiety and other neurological conditions.
JettProof came about when my adorable child, Jett was diagnosed with severe Autism, Global Development Delay and Sensory Processing Disorder at 3 years of age. With up to 14 meltdowns before midday most days, I was desperate to find a product to help Jett stay calm, focused and responsive to language and instructions.
A worldwide search did not locate a suitable garment for special needs children that would gently self-regulate a child and could be worn under normal clothing throughout the day, every day, and for all seasons.
With over 20 years of extensive clothing manufacturing, design, export and marketing background, I decided to provide a solution to help Jett and other families throughout the world. JettProof was created! "
On August 31, JettProof posted this meme. I am assuming the photo is of Jett.
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{"Their success isn't determined by their challenges JETT PROOF I am an adult with Autism. I cannot read a traditional clock, do not know multiplications, and have trouble tying my shoelaces... I am also a law school graduate and hold a corporate job. The ability to tie your shoelaces does not determine your success."} |
Why is this important? Edge of the Playground had posted this at an earlier date. its actually a line from their book.
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{I am an autistic adult. I cannot read a traditional clock, do not know multiplication, and have trouble tying my shoes. Tam a law school graduate and hold a corporate job. The ability to tie your shoes does not determine your success. edgeoftheplayground.com} |
Looks very similar, doesn't it? They changed an autistic author's words to promote their agenda of martyrdom. They did not change it until they were confronted with the autistic community. There were several autistics, myself included, that were banned from the page for telling them they committed plagiarism. They still did not unban any of the autistic people who spoke out.
Plagurized Again
A good friend of mine who runs the Quirky Stimmy Cool Facebook page was plagiarized by CalmWear directly. Here is the original:
Here is the Stolen Words Used by CalmWear:
As one of the commenters said, stealing from Autistics is not a good look.
Sia Created a movie about autistic people without casting an autistic person as the lead. More about it
here. Connie had an issue with proper representation. She responded to the actress I admire the most, Marlee Matlin. Marlee Matlin is a symbol of inclusion. I adore her and she inspired me as ayoung Deaf child and Hard of hearing child after surgery.
Conning could not leave the Deaf community out of this conversation after Marlee came as an ally to the autistic community which made me happy. I adore Marlee Matlin, she is a symbol of inclusion. Connie couldn't have that. The rest of the conversation was quite pathetic but i felt like I had to defend both disability communities that I belong do. Have a read.
She throws the Deaf community under the bus, accused me of not being autistic, ableist against people with cluster B disorders and accused me of doxxing her (this tweet was removed by twitter after I reported it) when all the info I got was from public sources and his cited here like a good researcher I am. She accuses me of harassing "autism families" by reporting people who abuse their kids with pseudoscience. I also "ruin it for neurodiversity." Last I checked, I save lives. She is the one running a business without a license.
I don't owe her my diagnosis, I don't owe her anything. I stopped engaging because I had work to do. I think with her attitude that she bleachers her son but i can't prove it. Its the way she talks to me. They usually have the same attitude and rhetoric. She gives off a bleacher vibe to me. Only time will tell.
It later came to light that Connie uses Prone restraint on her son. I am trained in it because I used to work for ARC before I even knew I was autistic. It was part of a job but I NEVER had to use it and I am so thankful for that. It is when the person in crisis is placed face down and the legs and arms are pinned. They literally are placed on the floor like that until they "calm down." It is dangerous and has caused death. Even when we had B, I NEVER would think of doing that.
Connie Impersonates an Anti ND Autistic
It is no secret that Connie hates my boycott list. Its not a "you must stay away." It is more like "visit at your own risk." Mostly martyr moms hate my list than anyone. Autistics have come to me thanking me for it!
After a big blowup about the list, a new account on instagram popped up.
Http://www.instagram.com/authentic_autism_advocacy
It was an account where the autistic was named Amanda. Quite. a few advocates had told me about this. Several of my friends and I had a feeling it was Connie but we could not prove it. She spends her time calling out female and AFAB autistics fakers but spent her time pretending to be an autistic when she in fact is not.
We could not prove it UNTIL NOW. I did not uncover it but THANK YOU to the autistic who did. I was busy with a newborn so I did not have time to dive into it.
It should have been so obvious with the first name she chose. She has has an obsession with my boycott list. This was a direct attack on me and like usual it backfired. Autistics always see patterns in things. At least she could have changed the phone number and email and maybe we would not have caught you. Leave the fake profiles to the bleacher hunters.
And yet another fake account by Connie:
Don't you have an illegal business to run and offspring to exploit?
I pray that Chevy finds his community and gets away from her toxicity.
After She is Exposed, She Still Targets Me
After an unrelated persons stole an edit of mine, posted it on Amazon complete with MY LOGO, I had to apply for a Trademark so this would never happen again. In one group on Facebook someone was looking for actually autistic designs for an acceptance shirt I commented. I had NO IDEA that Connie was in that group until she tagged me on IG. Honestly if she did not tag me, I probably would have never known. Thank you for outting yourself to me.
Instagram took it down really quickly. I was also told she was on a few of my posts while I was sleeping. Several followers reported those comments and got those removed as well. Thank you. I appreciate you all.
Connie Uses Quackery on Chevy
After being messaged by @g.e.a.r_insta on instagram with this evidence, I had to look into this quack further!
Dr. Sebi is the quack I researched with this instagram user's help. With a newborn, this was very much appreciated.
the video of Connie admitting she does this to her son:
Joint Hate Campaign Against Me and My Son By Connie and Fiona Oleary
After writing this blog about bed wetting and what to do so its dram free, Fiona says its disturbing and recruited Fiona Oleary. In this blog I describe what can be done to support children who wet their bed without shaming them. I got thanked by autistic parents and even the Neurodivergent Therapy Collective shared it and endorsed this advice.
We had a welfare check by a deputy we know well. Very nice guy. Saw the kids were in teletherapy (speech and OT) and told us ot have a nice day.
Next day a DCF worker and a different deputy showed up. This deputy wasn't so nice but the DCF worker is a peach. I really do like him. He saw that my children have refused to clean their rooms. It happens. Nick and I cleaned it up and then they came back. He did some digging and saw past reports were ridiculous things that were not abuse or neglect. He then went to the school and lectured the principal on what neglect and abuse is and not to make these ridiculous calls because it traumatizes the kids. This is especially true for those who are not biologically mine. They do not need to relive their past.
He then talked to all the older kids about keeping their rooms cleaned. They promised them they would. We were then talking about my advocacy and where this allegation came from. He then asked for all evidence, which I have friends all over the internet who collected it for me, and put it in my file. This way DCF here in Florida can be aware and not let this through again.
He was mostly upset about the same thing I am:
Valuable resources that could have been used to save a child who was in danger was wasted on us.
He talked to his supervisor and his supervisor agreed that there was no reason for him to be there and they closed the case.
I want to thank all the people who have been supportive since this nightmare started.
All the screenshots and receipts can be found here :
Sources:
https://www.thebalancesmb.com/as-a-non-canadian-how-can-i-open-a-business-in-canada-2948586
www. calmwear.net
canadasbusinessregistries.ca
Http://dos.ny.gov
https://smallbusiness.chron.com/can-happen-open-business-business-license-2461.html
Canada may have “free healthcare” but if you were missed growing up as a female due to being born before more recent studies you’re still screwed out of a free diagnosis. Once you’re 18 it’s 3-5k for a diagnosis and many still won’t diagnose females or atypical presenting properly.
ReplyDeleteImho should be free still at least until they get to people born in 2030 or 2040 cause by then hopefully it won’t be missed in masking people until they age out.
The same goes for Australia. It was a 2 year wait for a child in the public system so i paid to get all 4 kids assessed through the private system at $800-$1400 each. Adults in my state still need to wait 2 years through the private system and it cost me $450
DeleteSame in the UK. I waited nearly 20 years trying to get an official diagnosis with someone who was familiar with autism and AFAB people, as well as adult diagnosis, and it cost £1500. And, as most of the "free" psychs have multiyear waiting lists for assessment, and not all areas have people familiar with adult diagnosis, who would dismiss you anyway, there's no guarantee you'd get an effective diagnosis.
ReplyDeleteMy friend in Australia's husband was referred to one psych who instantly dismissed the idea of autism because he made eye contact, finished school and got married. So they had to pay for a private assessment. And the same goes for ADHD - Australia won't fund medication for adults unless they were diagnosed as a child. Ridiculous.